How it happened... one man's perspective

Let me begin by saying, it's been an impossibly-difficult-to-describe-wondermous kind of week. So much has happened that it's hard to believe little Ellie was born just a week ago. Moreover, because of all that has transpired this past week, I am certain that my recollection of the events leading up to her birth might be a bit off. With that said, I'm going to do my brief best to recall those events here, for you, our interested reader.

If you know me, or you recall from an earlier post, I work nights - typically second shift, but in the months leading up to Ellie's arrival it was more like third shift. On Friday, the 15th, I got up way too early for someone having to work that night from 9pm-5am. I don't recall if I got a nap in later that day; but, suffice it to say, I went to work and all was relatively well until the phone rang at 3am on the 16th.

EM was experiencing severe back pain and could not sleep. However, she indicated that she did not need me and that she'd make due 'til I got home. With my shift over, I arrived at the house around 5:20am to find her sitting on the floor in obvious discomfort. Again, she indicated there was nothing to do and I went to bed without her. As it turns out, the pain did not lessen and as I slept she called the doctor. EM woke me up around 6:30am, and said we've got to go to the hospital - the doctor was concerned it was either labor or a kidney issue.

We made it to the triage unit in the labor/delivery unit of the hospital around 7:20am not knowing what was going on or what to expect. Paperwork was completed, questions answered and routine evaluations completed and yet nothing was clear about the source of EM's pain. It was only until a routine, and initially overlooked, cervical exam was complete a few hours later that things started to change. EM was bleeding. The doctor decided, due to the advanced stage of pregnancy, not to take any chances - labor would be induced.

By 11am or so, we spread the word that little Ellie was on the way. As the staff prepared to move EM to a labor/delivery room, I went to get the two of us a bite to eat. After lunch, which EM did not respond well to, the inducement and waiting began. EM made slow, steady progress with respect to dilation and effacement (see my prior comment here). By 4pm she received an epidural. Eventually, and I don't recall exactly when, we were joined by EM's mom (I think she's going by Nanny, but I'm not sure) and AK.

It was a long, and for EM uncomfortable, wait. We estimated, and revised, arrival times. We guessed baby weight and length and even got in a card game - all to pass the time. Throughout this time EM and Ellie were fine according to all the medical monitors. Then, two skits into SNL, we were informed it was time to push.

Now prior to this, we had prepared a birth plan. The plan called for me, and me alone, to be in the delivery room. However, when it came time to push that plan somehow changed. Nana and AK stayed, and thank God they did - they were a huge help! In fact, I've wondered in retrospect what would have happened if they weren't there. You see, I stayed by EM per the plan and the rest of team Ellie - Nana and AK - each grabbed a leg. So if they weren't there, what would have happened? Would her legs have been placed in stirrups? Would other nurses have been called in? It's really immaterial, but I wonder nonetheless.

Team Ellie, without any practice or experience, came together quickly. With nurse Roxanne coaching us, EM pushed and pushed and pushed some more and we did our best to help. An hour plus into the pushing, the doctor was consulted and it was decided that Ellie would come out with a little help from her good friend, Mr. Forceps. By 1:30am on the 17th everything was in place for the final part of Ellie's delivery. After twenty-some hours of labor, and close to two hours of pushing, poor EM was exhausted and could push no more. Dr. Lipscomb took over from there and pulled our little girl out - at 1:46am - and as he did he noticed the cord was wrapped around Ellie's neck. As it turned out, the cord was a non-issue. I think the doctor was simply surprised the cord was there since her vitals had been so consistently good throughout the process.

The emotions that run through you during this time are so intense and varied; but, once you hear the first cry it is nothing but pure joy and relief. I'd be a liar if I said it didn't bring tears to my eyes - it was that awesome. Then, as everyone rushed around to see and attend to Ellie, EM and I shared some wonderfully peaceful moments together as the doctor tended to her needs. After all of that, I got to hold my little girl....


-ED